Welcome to *30*, a column / dialogue / blog / novel / travelogue of the first few years of the new millenium written by and starring an increasingly desperate, caffeine-fried, ex-pat "human being" named Brian Cotts.  And there's me, too.  Hi, I'm Bob.  *30*'s all over the road.  If it has some sort of bearing on Brian's life, and on life in general, it'll wind up here sooner or later.  Subjects range from Sailor Moon to Heidegger, death-tapes to electronic music, bitter crabby rants, thoughtful sadness, love, joy, loneliness and madness, politics and terror, cryptic allusions, confused humour, sometimes just plain confusion, and much much more!

(Not to mention what's probably the longest epilogue in the history of writing.)

C'mon in... room for one more....

 What Has Gone Before:
 

PHASE 1: 1999.
"In Which We Meet Our Heroes,
Establish A Few Parameters,
See An Opera,
Count Downwards To Apocalypse,
And Have A Few
Light And
Comical Adventures
Along The Way."

Act ONE:  "LETTING X=Y"
30.01:  January 1, 1999:  "M+Ms?"
30.02:  January 15, 1999:  "Goodnight, Gracie!"
30.03:  January 30 / February 1, 1999:  "...a loved a long the riverrun, past Eve and Adam's, from..."
30.04:  February 14 / 15, 1999:  "V. Day Will Tear Us Apart."
30.05:  March 1, 1999:  "Refracted thro' th' Cathodes, Such A Sensitive Boy...."
30.06:  March 15, 1999:  "Playing The Game."
30.07:  April 1, 1999:  "Self-Nullification for Fun and Profit."
30.08:  April 15, 1999:  "Staring Straight Ahead."

Act TWO:  "GRACEFUL MONSTERS"
30.09a:  May 1, 1999: Graceful Monsters, scene one: "Opening The City."
30.09b:  May 8, 1999: Graceful Monsters, scene two: "Verispeed."
30.09c:  May 15, 1999: Graceful Monsters, scene three:  "A Night At The Opera."
30.09d:  May 23, 1999: Graceful Monsters, scene four:  "Two And Four Sevenths Days At The Races."
30.09e:  June 1, 1999: Graceful Monsters, scene five:  "Into.... (Closing The City)"

Act THREE:  "THE MAMBO"
30.10:  June 15, 1999:  "Greater Bitter Amplitude."
30.11a:  July 1, 1999:  "Shafts Of Light, part 1."
30.11b:  July 15, 1999:  "Shafts Of Light, part 2."
30.11c:  August 1, 1999:  "Shafts Of Light, part 3."
30.12:  August 15, 1999:  "This Is The One Where Brian Talks About How We Are Reading More And More But Reading More And More Simpler And How That Is Really Actually Quite Very Bad Indeed."
30.13:  September 1, 1999:  "M+Ms!"
30.14:  September 15, 1999:  "Moon Crisis Makeup!!!"
30.15:  October 1, 1999:  "Bodies And Nails... or something...."

CODA:      THE OTHER WAY OF STOPPING:
                  gearing up for the
                  Year 2000
30.16:  October 15, 1999:  "Loneliness Is Its Own Reward."
30.17:  November 1, 1999:  "He Shoots, He Scores!"
30.18:  November 15, 1999:  "Pastel Blue."
INTERLUDE.
30.19:  December 1, 1999:  "Trace My Name...."
30.20:  December 15, 1999:  "4'33''."
30.21:  December 31, 1999:  "*30* (The Mambo)."
 

PHASE 2:  2000.
"In Which A Border Is Crossed,
A World Is NOT Destroyed
(or is it?),
A Good Friend Goes To Japan,
Brian Gets Sick,
And Stasis IS The Order Of The Day."

Act ONE:  "FROM THE OTHER SIDE."
PROLOGUE:  January 1, 2000:  "Optical Panning."
30.22:  January 15, 1999:  "Natural Light."
30.23:  January 30 / February 1, 2000:  "In Which Brian Talks About Anime And The Internet In Order To Forget His Birthday Which Occurred Two Days Ago On January 30th, 2000."
30.24:  February 15, 2000:  "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRG!!!!!!!!!!!!...."
30.25a:  March 1, 2000:  "THREE DEVICES #1:  The Automobile."
30.25b:  March 15, 2000:  "THREE DEVICES #2:  The Telephone."
30.25c:  April 1, 2000:  "THREE DEVICES #3:  The Record Button."
30.26:  April 15, 2000:  "A Code In His Node."
30.27:  May 1, 2000:  "The Mouse And The Eagle."

Act TWO:  "KIMI GOES TO JAPAN"
30.28a:  "May 15, 2000":  "Working Towards It."
30.28b:  "June 1, 2000":  "Working With It."
30.28c:  "June 15, 2000":  "It."
30.28d:  "July 1, 2000":  "...The Forever."
30.28e:  "July 15, 2000:"  "The Return."
30.28f:  "August 1, 2000:"  "Summer light with Hello Kitty At McDonald's, some excellent fun!  Latebreaking News: The Power Of Japan Has A Hold On Us All!"
30.28g:  "August 15, 2000:"  "The Kimi Tape."
30.28h:  "September 1, 2000:"  "Where We Go, And What We Do When We Get There."
30.28i:  "September 15, 2000:"  "The Anthem of Shibuya."

Act THREE:  "FIZZLES."
30.29:  October 1, 2000:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 2."
30.30:  October 15, 2000:  "30/30 Vision."
30.31a:  November 1, 2000:  "Where It's At, part one."
30.31b:  November 8, 2000:  "Where It's At, part two."
30.31c:  November 15, 2000:  "Where It's At, part three."
30.32:  November 23, 2000:  "Deadlocks."
30.33:  December 1, 2000:  "Holding Smoke In My Hands (Or: a ver' long dayscushon of Jacques Derrida et day-con-struct-shun dat weel no doubt answair none of your quais-shuns and onlee mek yoor 'eads 'urt!)"
30.34:  December 15, 2000:  "The Spectacular Commodity."
EPILOGUE:  December 31, 2000:  "*30* (In The Belly Of The Beast)."
 

PHASE 3: 2001.
"In Which Another Border Is Crossed,
A Trip Is Undertaken,
A Couple Of Towers Fall,
A "War" Is Begun,
And,
Ultimately,
Anticlimax Rules."

PRELUDE:     THE OTHER WAY OF STARTING
                        winding down for the
                       Year 2001
30.35a:  January 1, 2001:  "Pygmalism."
30.35b:  January 1, 2001:  "Perfect Lives."
30.35c:  January 1, 2001:  "Crossing The Threshold (The Mouse And The Eagle, part 3)."
30.35d:  January 1, 2001:  "Extra Code."
30.35e:  January 1, 2001:  "Millennium Blues."

Act ONE:  "STATIC ANATOMIES."
30.36:  January 15, 2001:  "The Crackdown."
30.37:  February 1, 2001:  "Always Thought It Sounded Like What You'd Call A Sleepy Cartoon Hamster."
30.38:  February 14/15, 2001:  "...And Along Comes Brian In The Baby Carriage (V. Day Part 3).
30.39:  March 1, 2001: "The I Ain't Got Nobody Post-Nietzsche, Post-Baudrillard Blues, or: Losing Your Gravity."
30.40:  March 15, 2001:  "In The Court Of The Cro-Magnon King."
30.41:  April 1, 2001:  "Nil Spiral 30 Loops (Wounded Polymetheus Version)."
30.42:  April 15, 2001:  "Superheroes."
30.43:  May 1, 2001:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 4."

INTERLUDE.

Act TWO:  "VANCOUVER."
30.44a:  May 15, 2001: Vancouver, prologue:  "Penumbral Rover."
30.44b:  May 23, 2001: Vancouver, part 1:  "Searching For A Comfortable Zero."
30.44c:  June 1, 2001: Vancouver, part 2:  "In The Nest."
30.44d:  June 8, 2001: Vancouver, part 3:  "The Voices Of Insects."
30.44e:  June 15, 2001: Vancouver, part 4:  "One Of Three."
30.44f:  June 23, 2001: Vancouver, part 5:  "Over There.
30.44g:  July 1, 2001: Vancouver, part 6:  "What You Need."
30.44h:  July 8, 2001: Vancouver, part 7:  "Maybe Call It Something That's Self Reflexive And Witty While Referring To Both The Movie 'Things' AND To The Emily Carr Student Installation."
30.44i:  July 15 - August 1, 2001:  Vancouver, part 8:  "The Unutterable."
30.44i.00:  July 15, 2001:  "The Unutterable."
30.44i.01:  July 15, 2001:  "Pieces Of A Modern Style."
30.44i.02:  July 15, 2001:  "Spring Idyll."
30.44i.03:  July 15, 2001:  "Like Pictures."
30.44i.04:  July 15, 2001:  "Cherry Blossom."
30.44i.05:  July 15, 2001:  "The Classical."
30.44i.06:  July 15, 2001:  "Walking..."
30.44i.07:  July 15, 2001:  "Revelation"
30.44i.08:  July 15, 2001:  "Distraction."
30.44i.09:  July 15, 2001:  "Ballard's Reverie."
30.44i.10:  July 15, 2001:  "Through The Mists Of Time."
30.44i.11:  July 15, 2001:  "Feeling Wanted And Needed."
30.44i.12:  July 15, 2001:  "Overheard Dialogue In The Foodcourt Of A Mall."
30.44i.13:  July 15, 2001:  "What Separates us From The Animals."
30.44i.14:  July 15, 2001:  "The Secret Face Of Expo '86."
30.44i.15:  July 23, 2001:  "'In this no-infinity, infinity is found....'"
30.44i.16:  July 23, 2001:  "B.G.M."
30.44i.17:  July 23, 2001:  "What REALLY Separates Us From the Animals."
30.44i.18:  July 23, 2001:  "In An Octopus's Garden."
30.44i.19:  July 23, 2001:  "In The Event."
30.44i.20:  July 23, 2001:  "Blue Sky on Mars."
30.44i.21:  July 23, 2001:  "Robert Crumb."
30.44i.22:  July 23, 2001:  "Floating Point (The Mouse And The Eagle, part 5)."
30.44i.23:  July 23, 2001:  "It's All Over But The Rage."
30.44i.24:  July 23, 2001:  "Neo Geo."
30.44i.25:  July 23, 2001:  "Limits."
30.44i.26:  July 23, 2001:  "Catching Cars."
30.44i.27:  July 23, 2001:  "Notes."
30.44i.28:  July 23, 2001:  "After The Gramme."
30.44i.29:  July 23, 2001:  "New Wheels For My Wagon (The Mouse And The Eagle, part 6)."
30.44i.30:  August 1, 2001:  "Pastoral Bliss, with garbage."
30.44i.31:  August 1, 2001:  "Trigger Happy."
30.44i.32:  August 1, 2001:  "1997:"
30.44i.33:  August 1, 2001:  "Hiropon."
30.44i.34:  August 1, 2001:  "Pastoral Bliss, with supercandies."
30.44i.35:  August 1, 2001:  "2001:"
30.44i.36:  August 1, 2001:  "Still Feeling Wanted and Needed (and maybe even a little loved)."
30.44i.37:  August 1, 2001:  "Faster Than The Speed of Life."
30.44i.38:   August 1, 2001:  "Spinning Away."
30.44i.39:  August 1, 2001:  "Discreet Music."
30.44i.40:  August 1, 2001:  "...And Maybe Even Feeling More Than A Little Decentred And Strange."
30.44i.41:  August 1, 2001:  "Where You Get Love."
30.44i.42:  August 1, 2001:  "Spiral Honey."
30.44i.43:  August 1, 2001:  "Empty Frame."
30.44i.44:  August 1, 2001:  "Aporia."
30.44j:  August 8, 2001: Vancouver, part 9:  "Making An Impression."
30.44k:  August 15, 2001: Vancouver, epilogue:  "Ease."

INTERLUDE.

Act THREE:  "*30* (LETTING....)"
30.45:  September 1, 2001:  "Stoppage."
30.46a:  "September 15, 2001:"  "Whatever's Old's New Again, part 1: Falling Up"
30.46b:  "September 23, 2001:"  "Whatever's Old's New Again, part 2:  The End Of The End."
30.46c:  "October 1, 2001:"  "Whatever's Old's New Again, part 3:  The Turnpike."
30.46d:  "October 8, 2001:"  "Whatever's Old's New Again, part 4:  Bert."
30.46e:  "October 15, 2001:"  "Whatever's Old's New Again, part 5:  Redundancy Theory."
30.47a:  November 1, 2001:  "People Who Matter, part one: Nick Currie (Momus)."
30.47b:  November 8, 2001:  "People Who Matter, part two: Dave Sim."
30.48:  November 15, 2001:  "The State Of The Nation.
30.47c:  November 23, 2001:  "People Who Matter, part three: Laurie Anderson."
30.49:  December 1, 2001:  "End Game."
30.47d:  December 5, 2001:  "People Who Matter, part four: J.G. Ballard."
30.47e:  December 10, 2001:  "People Who Matter part five: William Gaddis."
30.50:  December 15, 2001:  "The Kindness Of Women."
30.51:  December 20, 2001:  "The Gap."
30.52:  December 25, 2001:  "'Tis The Season."
30.53:  December 30, 2001:  "'Winning' The 'War.'"
30.54:  "December 31, 2001:"  "*30* (Insignificance)."
 

EPILOGUE: 2002-5.
"In Which Nothing Is Real."

REMOTE FEED.
EP.01:  January 1, 2002:  "'Going' To The 'Show.'"
EP.02:  January 15, 2002:  "Crisis Points."
EP.03:  February 1, 2002:  "Epilogue Journal 1: Surfing The Vacuum."
EP.04:  February 8, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 1."
EP.05:  Ferbruary 15, 2002:  "Epilogue Journal 2: MORT."
EP.06:  February 23, 2002:  "Like Pictures."
EP.07:  March 1, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 2."
EP.08:  March 8, 2002:  "Epilogue Journal 3: No-Man's Land."
EP.09:  March 15, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 3."
EP.10:  March 23, 2002:  "Epilogue Journal 4: The Tip Of The Iceberg."
EP.11:  March 25, 2002:  "(FOOTNOTE)."
EP.12:  April 1, 2002:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 7:  Dinner With The Aardvark."
EP.13:  April 2, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 4."
EP.14:  April 4, 2002:  "Endless Summer."
EP.15:  April 5, 2002:  "Some Scattered Comments About Eija-Riitta Eklöf-Berliner-Mauer And Her Relationship With The Berlin Wall."
EP.16:  April 8, 2002:  "'Speaking' His 'Mind.'"
EP.17:  April 15:  "People Who Need People, part 5."
EP.18:  April 23, 2002:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 8:  The 'Real' World."
EP.19:  May 1, 2002:  "Vanishing Point / Journal 5: Interpolations."
EP.20:  May 8, 2002:  "Whatever's New Is Old Again."
EP.21:  May 15, 2002:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 9:  The 'School' Of 'Life'."
EP.22:  May 23, 2002:  "Heather's Soliloquy."
EP.23:  June 1, 2002:  "Mindful Of The Calm."
EP.24:  June 8, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 6."
EP.25:  June 15, 2002:  "Epilogue Journal 6: Midnight Rain."
EP.26:  June 23, 2002:  "On The Edge Of The Periphery Of The Belly Of The Beast."

INTERLUDE:  July 1, 2002

THE WAR PARTY.
EP.27a:  July 8, 2002.  "Prologue: Art Decade."
EP.27b:  July 15, 2002:  "Part 1:  Shattered Times."
EP.27c:  July 23, 2002:  "Part 2:  Naked Hippies And The Meaning Of Democracy."
EP.27d:  August 1, 2002:  "Part 3:  July / August."
EP.27e:  August 3, 2002.  "Part 4:  Wishful Thinking."
EP.27f:  August 8, 2002.  "Part 5:  The Scouting Expedition:  THE NUMB BEFORE THE STORM."
EP.27g:  August 10, 2002.  "Part 6:  Riding In Cars With Alex (1)."
EP.27h:  August 15, 2002.  "Part 7:  The Scouting Expedition: THE OTHER SIDE."
EP.27i:  August 23, 2002.  "Part 8: "Real Men Don't Wear Hats."
EP.27j:  September 1, 2002.  "Part 9:  Safety, Dancing."
EP.27k:  September 8, 2002.  "Part 10:  BANG!"
EP.27l:  September 9, 2002.  "Part 11:  Riding In Cars With Alex (2)."
EP.27m:  September 10, 2002.  "Part 12:  August / September."
EP.27n:  September 11, 2002.  "Part 13:  How I spent my September 11th, a real good essay by Brian Cotts."
EP.27.o:  September 15, 2002.  "Part 14:  Passive Mode."
EP.27p:  September 18, 2002.  "Part 15:  Ralphie Knows Best."
EP.27q:  September 23, 2002.  "Part 16:  The Anticlimax After The Storm."
EP.27r:  October 1, 2002.  "Part 17:  The Language Of Love."
EP.27s:  October 3, 2002:  "Part 18:  October Idyll."
EP.27t:  October 5, 2002:  "Part 19:  Aporia (part 2)."
EP.27u:  October 8, 2002:  "Part 20:  Night Vision."
EP.27v:  October 15, 2002:  "Part 21:  Real Men Don't Wear Hats-- SIDE B: Pop Goes The World."
EP.27w:  October 23, 2002:  "Part 22:  Wipeout, or a brief survey of the history and meaning of Hüsker Dü."
EP.27x:  November 1, 2002:  "Part 23:  October Fragments."
EP.27y:  November 8, 2002:  "Part 24:  Dust."
EP.27z:  November 15, 2002:  "Epilogue:  Heathen."

INTERLUDE:  November 23, 2002.

THE ART OF EXHAUSTION.
EP.28:  December 1, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 7."
EP.29:  December 8, 2002:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 10."
EP.30:  December 15, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 8."
EP.31:  December 23, 2002:  "People Who Need People, part 9."
EP.32:  January 1, 2003:  "Wind/Stopping/Depreciation."
EP.33:  January 8, 2003:  "Stopping/Depreciation/Null."
EP.34:  January 15, 2003:  "Bob's Soliloquy."
EP.35:  January 23, 2003:  "We're NOT Guppies, People!!!!, or: Some Flies Are Better Left Zipped (The Lost *30*)."
EP.36:  January 30, 2003:  "Depreciation/Null/Ruins."
EP.37a:  February 1, 2003:  "Houston, We Have A Problem (1)."
EP.37b:  February 8, 2003:  "Houston, We Have A Problem (2)."
EP.38:  February 15, 2003:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 11: The Wolf And The Penguin."
EP.39: February 23, 2003:  "Some Thoughts On The Art Of Teaching Students Who Don't really Want To Be There."
EP.40:  March 1, 2003:  "Scuttling."
EP.41: March 8, 2003:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 12:  The Wolf And The Penguin (continued)."
EP.42:  March 15, 2003:  "Knee Play."

THE WAR PARTY-- 2.
EP.43a:  March 19, 2003:  "Shock!  And!!  Awe!!!"
EP.43b:  March 23, 2003:  "Line, Please!"
EP.43c:  April 1, 2003:  "Radical Hermetics."
EP.43d:  April 8, 2003:  "Gasping For Air."
EP.43e:  April 15, 2003:  "Support."
EP.43f:  April 23, 2003:  "Bowling For Iraq."
EP.43g:  May 1, 2003:  "Bored Now...."

INTERLUDE: May 8, 2003.

FEAR.
30.EP.44:  May 15, 2003:  "The Daily Grind."
30.EP.45:  May 23, 2003:  "DeLilloscape."
30.EP.46:  June 1, 2003:  "MCtv."
30.EP.47:  June 8, 2003:  "Mall Voices."
30.EP.48:  June 15, 2003:  "Calgary, again."
30.EP.49:  June 23, 2003:  "Harry Potter and the Gargantuan Lineup of June 21, 2003."
30.EP.50:  July 1, 2003:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 13: Infinite Return."
30.EP.51:  July 8, 2003:  "Retreating To A Useful position (1)."
30.EP.52:  July 15, 2003:  "Duckies."
30.EP.53:  July 23, 2003:  "Retreating To A Useful position (2)."
30.EP.54:  August 1, 2003:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 14: Kevin."
30.EP.55:  August 8, 2003:  "Bob And The Meaninglessness Of Morning."
30.EP.56:  August 15, 2003:  "Bob And The Blackout."
30.EP.57:  August 23, 2003:  "Bob And The Will To Pornography."
30.EP.58:  September 1, 2003:  "Retreating To A Useful Position (3)."
30.EP.59:  September 8, 2003:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 15: Rust Never Sleeps."
30.EP.60:  September 15, 2003:  "Bob And Heather and The End Of The End Of The Century (the beginning)".
30.EP.61:  September 23, 2003:  "Heather's Soliloquy (II).
30.EP.62:  October 1, 2003:  "Bob And Heather and The End Of The End Of Century (the end)."
30.EP.63:  October 8, 2003:  "Retreating To A Useful Position (4)."
30.EP.64:  October 15, 2003:  "The Mouse And The Eagle, part 15: The Clarity of    ."
30.EP.65:  October 23, 2003:  "Bob And Heather in:  Run, Bob, Run."
30.EP.66:  November 1, 2003:  "Bob's Soliloquy (II)."
30.EP.67:  November 8, 2003:  "Bob And Heather: 4'33''."
INTERLUDE.
30.EP.68:  November 15, 2003:  "Retreating To A Useful Position (5)."
30.EP.69:  November 23, 2003:  "Residue."
30.EP.70:  December 1, 2003:  "Pynchonia."
30.EP.71:  December 8, 2003:  "The Case Of The Missing M+Ms."
30.EP.72:  December 15, 2003:  "FEAR."

--30--